Leading from Within-Part 3： Aligning Actions with Intentions

Speaker 1

That's right, Mike. And now in episode three, it's going to be talking about aligned action. Why? Because clarity without action is just wishful thinking. Momentum comes when you consistently act from your identity. So Mike, let's be honest about this topic and let's be honest about this in general. Most leaders, they don't drift like we talked about earlier because they don't care. That's usually not the problem. They drift because they don't translate clarity into consistent action. They know who they are. They can even regulate their emotions, but they some reason stop short of execution. I know I'm guilty of this. So let me break this down from a from a practical level. What do I mean by that? So clarity means getting real and open and honest with oneself and answering the hard questions. So this can apply to many areas in your life. let's just say you're failing in one area of life. Are you willing to peel back the layers of that onion and then expose the problem, but then to continue to peel until you find the root cause? Because if you're not willing to keep peeling the onion back until you get to the core of the issue, you're never gonna be able to solve it. It's just gonna be one of those things that you just kick that can down the road consistently and you never find that clarity and it becomes who you are. and unfortunately what you are because you're unwilling to get clear. So practical example, just picked a random one out of the air, Mike. Let's say, so let's say that my business is struggling with lead follow-up. Like that's a problem. And on the surface to me, it just seems like this is a timing issue. Well, that's easy to say, that's easy to do. But here's the reality until I want to dig deep enough into that problem. I'm not solving anything. I'm just stating an issue out loud. and then we continue on like you and I talked about before, you have to get real with it. So, so the first thing I need to do, Mike, is I need to take that issue and I need to solve it. I need to get clarity within it. So how am I going to do that? Okay, so I'm going to write that down. I'm going to whiteboard it however I need to do it, but I'm going to write that down and then I'm going to outside of that nucleus, right? That is the nucleus of the problem. That may not be the core issue, but for now that is the nucleus and I can draw lines off of that and each line off of that is going to be an additional problem that I think this is caused by or causing. So first we have what seems to be the issue. Now we're trying to peel back the layers of the onion to see what's causing it. So, whoops, sorry about that. So the first step is writing it down. Now we're peeling it back. Now, what is the one thing that all these issues tie back to? Is it timing or is it something else? Because until I'm willing to go through these processes, and I've really simplified that, there's a lot more to that in timing and understanding, but just as a simple mantra that I'm trying to teach here, I need to become on I need to become clear on the issue. You know, I need to understand what is the issue this ties back to. And if I have multiple arrows pointing to one part of the problem, then OK, let's dig a little bit deeper here. Is this a timing issue or is this a personnel issue or is it a software issue? The list can go on, but however, I need to say, okay, now I have a second sheet of paper. How do I solve this issue and is this the root cause of the issue? So now that we know the layers are peeled back, we have each of these individual issues is causing the main issue. Now I need to get clear on how to solve and cross out each one of these until now I know how to solve the problem. This is probably when you want to bring your leadership team in if you have one, because now to get clear on the issue, I need to have another set of eyes on all the things that I think are problems. And then more than likely, a lot of those can be, you know, kill or keep part of the traction series, right? I really try to apply that in my business when I'm finding clarity through traction. Is this a kill or keep problem? Because if it's a kill, it's off the list and it's gone. If it's a keep, that means we're going to push that on to the second round. We're going to continue to talk about that until we get clear on this issue. And then once we know what the actual issues are, now we can start to solve the problem through what? Through systems, through protocols, through changes needed in business to say, OK, for my business to have a seamless lead follow up program, this is the protocol that we all need to follow. And I got to thinking about this, Mike, it's not just, I guess it's a random business idea, but how many times do we not do that? I am the world's worst about some of the biggest things I need to find clarity on, and I'll kick that can down the road. You know why? Because I'm scared of it. I am scared to find the root issue of the problem. And how guilty are we that in so many different areas of our lives? If we have a problem going on in our marriage, how often do we sit down and try to do what I just said? Or do we pretend it's going to get better on the back end when increasingly it's just going that snowball is already rolling, right? And it's going to keep rolling and it's going to keep rolling. It's going to keep getting worse and worse and worse until finally what happens? Kaboom. That's marriage. That's work. That's family. That's fitness. It ties back to everything and we can talk about clarity. every podcast, because at the end of the day, if you're unwilling to do that, if you're unwilling to sit in it and get clarity in the problems, then you're never going to solve them. And then guess what, Mike, that's not going to allow you to bring that inner ability of leadership out in a more thorough fashion because you stay stuck in the rut. So that's some of my thoughts on just how I approach this, you know, finding that inner clarity, Mike. What's your thoughts on that?

Speaker 2

Yeah, and sometimes, Shane, part of the problem with solving problems, whether it be in business or in your family or wherever, is that our ego gets in the way. We just think we know what the problem is. And so why dissect it? Why spend the time? You know, the world of aviation and aviation safety in particular, we call it the five whys. You ask, "Okay, you know, why did we have that issue?" And then the first answer usually needs another question, "Okay, but why did that happen?" And they ask another question, "Okay, but why did that happen?" And eventually you get to one or two or three or four things that created, as you said, those offshoots, all those little branches that get to the explanation of what the problem truly is. And oftentimes it's never what you thought it was. And that's true in relationships. That's true. We have ego and we have defensiveness. It's never us, right? It's always something outside of us. It's always the timing. It's always what, well, maybe it's you didn't pick up the inbox and make sure you handled the leads when you needed to. Maybe it's we had a safety issue because we didn't make sure that we trained everybody appropriately around that topic for long enough to make sure they really understood it, right? But no, no, no, couldn't have been me. I didn't do it. It's just too easy to say, "Oh, that person just didn't understand." Or, "There's no way to get to that inbox fast enough." And the truth is, there almost always is. And when I think about this stuff, Shannon, you're right. We could talk about clarity into infinity. But the truth is, is that when you have a to-be list, and we've talked about this a million times, You're going to be something, whether that be your business or yourself or your relationships or whatever. The easiest thing in the world is to say, "Here's what I'm going to go be," and then do nothing to execute against that because it's too hard or it's too embarrassing or it's too difficult. And that's drift, right? Drift is having this to-be list of doing things that you want to do, but what you actually do is counter that vision of yourself or your future. You accept mediocrity, either in your business or yourself. And so you say, well, I'm not going to drink anymore, or I'm going to get fit, or I'm going to solve this problem. I'm going to get to my leads faster. I'm going to improve my safety actions. That's good. Put that on paper. Now go do it. You got to ask yourself the 10 million reasons why you haven't been able to do that so far. Take weekends off from your nutrition. We're talking about a person, our coaching, that doesn't-- he won't track. He just refuses to track. And then he goes on vacation. He's definitely not tracking or going to the gym. He's on vacation. And then on weekends, it's like, ah, it's a weekend. And the guy's making progress, but he could make so much more progress if he said, this is who I want to become, and there are no excuses along that path. There is no drift. I'm going to get this done. And it's true whether you're in a relationship and you let weeks go by without having a real conversation with your kids or your spouse. Those real conversations is where the meat of the relationship happens. Basically all this stuff is, boils down to a basic lack of discipline. But alignment that we're talking about today, how we solve this problem, it looks like doing the small, sometimes boring consistent things that just reinforce your identity and your mission. And, you know, it, the best book that we've discussed that described this is the "Atomic Habits". It's boring, it's small, but it stacks and it's repeatable. - You know, you make a good point there, Mike. Now, before we move on to the next topic,

Speaker 1

I wanted to, or next point, I wanted to bring something back. I've had a unique experience of trying a few different things at the gym recently, as far as core offers. And one of the offers has been free. Free.

Speaker 2

- Which, why in the world would you give away a very expensive product for free?

Speaker 1

- Absolutely agree. Well, one, I wanna, you know, there's a lot of reasons behind that, but I also wanna help as many humans as I can. But here's what I've found. I ask each one of these people to schedule a one-on-one meeting with me in the course of this four weeks. Okay, it is it's a nutrition blueprint meeting. Basically, here's what I found is every human being has here's where you are. Here's where you are. Here is your why and here is where you want to be. It's very simple. It's very practical. But the reality is this, how much value do you truly put on where you are and where you want to be and does it tie together to your why? I say to them when I come into the room because I allow them to fill out a client game plan before I get in there and I say, "You know what? These answers on this paper mean a lot to me." You know why? Because when I force you to sit in this room by yourself and write these on paper, subconsciously you're going to write the biggest pain point that you have. human nature. You may not realize it, but what you wrote means a lot. Because that is the first thing that came to mind. So when you're talking about finding that clarity, Mike, the question that I pose, and it's just like you said before, you can either accept where you are now and refuse to get to where you want to be, or you can really lean into that why and understand this combined with what they're offering, what I'm willing to give can take me and put me where I want to be, but that comes into where's the value point. Are you willing to get up earlier? Are you willing to give up a little bit of sleep? Are you willing to give up basically one and a half fast-food meals a week because that'll cover the cost of your membership? It's amazing to me the number of people that have the where they want to be, which is a scale of one to ten, there are three or force. I can give you the exact plan how to get to 10 but if your value point is not low enough, if you've not found clarity in who you really want to be, you're going to continue to go through the motions whether it's with me, whether it's with you, or whether it's with any other human, Mike. So my point to tie back to your statement is, if you have a to-be list and on that to-be list is I am going to do whatever it takes, however long it takes to get myself from a 1 to a 10 on the satisfied scale of life, then that's exactly who you're going to be. You're not drifting at that point. You have clarity in who you want to become. So I just found that to be very fascinating and tie along, you know, with what you were saying is because if not, you can justify the reasons not to continue a million different ways, but you just have to find that clarity. Alright, so I just wanted to bring that in, tie that back together. So here's moving into what you and I come together to agree on. We want to have reflections on how this can be done, how this happens. So the first reflection that we have is, where am I clear but not consistent? Because if you're saying one thing but your habits tell another story, that means you're drifting. And God, how much are we seeing that on social media now? a subject expert. Everybody's going to tell you what's right or wrong. However, we have no idea what this human being is doing in their personal lives, if they're holding any of those standards, or if they're just trying to make money. So my point to that is, Mike, you can never be the person that says, "Do as I say, not as I do." Okay? Don't be that person. Get clear and understand where if I'm not clear, but I'm not being consistent, how can I fix this? Got any examples

Speaker 2

of that? Yeah. I mean, think about some of the greatest sitcoms we grew up on. The whole joke, the whole premise was do as I say, not as I do. Right. And I think you're back on this. We were talking about this earlier. And then, you know, it shows up in every facet of the 4F bomb. So when you think about faith, faith is a great one, right? The people who are sitting in the pew on Sunday and then treat their fellow man with disdain and frustration, and they spread rumors and they're adulterers, whatever. You can think of the millions of things that people absolutely do not follow their own model on in the world of faith, in the world of family. Think about the number of times, I know I've done it, I'm sure you've done it, where you tell your kids, "Don't do this," but then they see you do it. Whether that be scrolling on social media for three hours and you tell them, "Look, you got to put your phone down, you can't be doing it," or, "Definitely no phone at the table," and I'm guilty of picking it up because I got a text from work and it's crucially important I answer this text right now. Is it Is it really? Probably not. But in the moment I think it is, and one of my kids will say, hey dad, I thought no phones at the table. And you just go, screw that one up, right? And then, yeah, you know, fitness, this is just non-negotiable. If you're gonna say you're gonna track your nutrition and you're gonna do the work, specifically if you're a coach, if you make a trade of helping other people do this, and then you don't do it, It couldn't be more shameful of a position to be in. What have I forgotten? Finances. Finances. You say that you're gonna create a budget and you're going to save every month and when you get to the end of the month, oops, overspent here and oops, overspent there and I can't put anything in savings this month again and oops, in fact, I gotta draw a little from savings or I'm gonna put a little more on the credit card 'cause I've overspent. Terrible, right? You said this is who you're going to be and then you've chosen and you've been very clear about it. You've told everybody. At work, right? You create these core values, or you create a, here's what we're gonna go do to take this hill, and then you're not standing there on top of the hill. The great one I was thinking about, Shane, is in this new world of remote work, hybrid work, and you say, look, everyone's gotta be in the office three days a week, you're the boss, except you show up one or two days this week. Maybe you showed up four last week, but you decided to slack off a little this week, and everybody sees it, everybody notices it. They're gonna get fired if they do it, But you do it, and unless somebody holds you accountable for that, all you're doing is destroying your team. So, so many examples in all the F-bombs.

Speaker 1

- You know, my, is that, do you think the drift comes from just not having a set plan? I mean, I guess my point is, you know, two things. One, if I saw a post the other day, it made a lot of sense to me. How many personal trainers do you see that need personal training?

Speaker 2

- Oh man, it's something. with some of the people I see in my feet. - I'm like, "Man, come on, dog.

Speaker 1

"You gotta get in the fight, big dog, come on."

Speaker 2

But my point to drifting is,

Speaker 1

it's easy for everyone to say, "I'm going to do this." But do you believe, do you feel like what I was saying earlier holds true? Where's your value point at? Where do you value this change in your life? Is that where the drift comes when shit gets hard? Or does it come before it even gets hard when you make the realization, "This is not easy"?

Speaker 2

I think it comes in a lot of different phases for a lot of different people, but I think the vast majority of people, before they even utter the word, here's what I'm gonna go do, or here's what we're going to go do, or here's how we're gonna live our lives, they know they're not gonna live up to that. They know that that's not in 'em.

Speaker 1

And they say it anyway, why? - Is it like a limiting belief? Is that what you're saying?

Speaker 2

- I don't think it's a limiting belief. I think it's because they want to look like they're that leader. They want to portray that they're that person. And then they think they're gonna try, But then they don't have any real desire to try. So it's not a true to be list. It's not a true, this is who I'm going to go become. This, it's more a, this is who I want you to think I am.

Speaker 1

- It's an imposter syndrome.

Speaker 2

- Yeah, indeed.

Speaker 1

- But let me ask you this. How do people get past that? How do they say, flip the switch?

Speaker 2

- It's what you said. What's the value for you to achieve this thing? You have to find your why. You can't say, I'm going to go do this doesn't resonate with you and create a why for you, if it doesn't create the future you wanted, the relationships you wanted, whatever. And so I think once you do that, once you spend the time to really work on it and to spend that quiet time, you talked about this in a couple of episodes ago, go find the church or the quiet place or the whatever and spend time doing that. If it's not every day, it's a couple times a week and really look at yourself, really. If you really wanna be different, you gotta do it. You gotta be honest with yourself about who you are and where you are. And then you have to say, here's the things I know. And it doesn't have to be swallowing the elephant, doesn't have to be boiling the ocean, but it has to be the 1% or 2% or 5% that you're gonna work on with intent over the next two months, 12 months, 36 months, whatever, to go become that person you truly wanna be.

Speaker 1

- Now I think that's great. I'll move out of the way and let you jump into that second reflection.

Speaker 2

- Yeah, I think the second one is what small act of courage is overdue? And that courage is a strange word here, but it really does mean every leader, whether it be a leader of a business or a family or of yourself, you've got something that you've been avoiding. A tough conversation, most often that's what it is. A bold move that you really know you should do but for little challenging reasons you don't. Or even just picking up a new discipline. Avoidance, not doing what you need to go do is just drift in disguise. Do you have examples of that, Shane? What acts of courage are overdue and what people should do about that?

Speaker 1

Yeah, I think, of course, there's a long, long, long list here. But I love how you frame that at the end. Avoidance is just a drift in disguise, like putting it off. I tell people this all the time, especially in the world of fitness. You know, you have to think about things as a collective whole, like a pool or something. When I say that, like when I tell people is, okay, I'm not going to necessarily assign you to do 10,000 steps a day. I'm going to tell you to get 50,000 steps in seven days. You know why? Because if I assign you 10,000 a day and you fail on Tuesday, guess what? You're not going to start back till Sunday or Monday. That's right. I tell you, you've got seven days and you have a collective goal to work towards every day and you can chip. We want to chip away at this every single day. And I think that's where a lot of people fail, Mike. It's not so much that the act of courage is overdue. I think that they try to do too much at once. They don't give themself enough grace to say, this is who I am. like we talked about earlier, this is who I am, this is where I am, this is my why, this is where I want to be and become and if you think you can do that overnight, you're vastly mistaken. You are fooling yourself and you are setting yourself up for failure because the reality of the situation is this, day one or one day, that's the choice, that is the only choice that you have to make. in for the first day, then let's work on day two, three, four, stack, stack, stack. Because once you say, I want to walk in and lose 80 pounds in 30 days, and I have people do that. And I'm like, no, you're not going to do that. You can. But my point to that is, is the avoidance of the reality of the situation is where I'm headed with this. You're avoiding the reality of what you put yourself into. now it's time to dig out of that hole. Well most people the shovel gets heavy after about the second day. Alright, you got to keep digging you know even if even if this is this Mike people drift and don't even know it. Like instead of putting off the workout if you're dog-ass tired you're not feeling the best you've had a rough day come in and give me 40%. That 40% is a hell of a lot better than zero even by my math and I feel like that's where the avoidance comes in. When things get hard you just rather not do it at all than do something. So don't fall into that and I guess tying that back to be courageous in your action and say, "Okay, this is who I said I wanted to be. The value point is a 10 and if a value point is a 10, that means 10 out of 10 times I'm going to do what I said I was going to do. I didn't rate myself an 8 or a 7 or a 9, I said a 10." So that's the second thing is make sure you understand how you rate yourself because there's flaws in that as well, Mike. But that's a whole nother conversation. But I think that's to me is take the small actions to build the courage to continue long-term, if that ties into your question.

Speaker 2

- Yeah, it does. And I think that makes perfect sense when you're talking about working on yourself. I think one of the things when we talk about avoidance being the drift in disguise, rather than just taking on too much, which is what people often do, when you have to work on those around you, right? If you're a leader and you're running a team and you got somebody on your team who's just the anchor, every other boat is rowing and they're moving, but you got this person who's an anchor, whether it be emotionally or the work product isn't as good as it needs to be, et cetera. A lot of leaders will just kind of say, "Yeah, yeah, that's Johnny, just, you know, "we'll ignore him, we'll keep moving." No, the small act of courage is we need everybody rowing the same damn direction and we're gonna have that difficult, not we, I'm going to have that difficult discussion with Johnny and I'm gonna tell him what I see and why I see it. Think about all the people that you've ever worked for. We talk about this a lot. For me, the people that I appreciate the most were those that were willing to call me on my bullshit, to tell me when I'm not doing what I should be doing, not allowing me to continue down that path. And that's what weak leaders do. That's the avoidance that creates drift 'cause now you're not achieving your mission as quickly or as effectively as you could because you're allowing this thing to happen. And maybe that is a separation that needs to take place and that's that bold move and et cetera. So I think there's two components of that. What you do when you're managing yourself do when you're managing those around you? I couldn't agree more because you're exactly right.

Speaker 1

And throwing the book Traction back into the ring again today, I guess that's my favorite book. It has a tool in there called the People Analyzer.

Speaker 2

That's right. And I love that. You've shared that with me.

Speaker 1

And as bad as I hate to say it, sometimes I don't choose to utilize it to the way that I should. And it's one of those ick type moments, the ick. When someone on your team says, oh, that's just so-and-so. That's just who they are. And we all hear it and you're like, gosh, I've created this. Speaker 3 This is dope.

Speaker 1

That's not the solution. That is not the answer. That's not who we are. Our standards are here. And just because Joe doesn't-- it's just Joe. It's OK. He's down here. No, Joe needs to get the hell off the team or start swimming towards the same helicopter. So I couldn't agree with you more from your practicality of being a good leader in the workplace. Because those, as you know, those are not comfortable conversations.

Speaker 2

Never are. And it doesn't matter how many times you've had one with somebody else, they're never comfortable, they're never fun, they're never easy, but they are always necessary. And hell, you might be wrong. You might learn something in that conversation that you didn't know. Maybe there's something going on in their personal life. Maybe it's actually Betty who's holding back the team. You don't know until you have the discussion,

Speaker 1

so you gotta do it. - And most of the time it's, I'd rather have someone in the seat than not. - Yep, oh, a lot of people are guilty of that.

Speaker 1

Man, well, but if I gotta let him go, then I'm gonna have to pick up the work. Yeah, that's life, that's leadership, figure it out. - Yeah, figure it out, move fast and figure it out as you go. All right, let's move into the third reflection. So the question is, how do my daily choices reinforce who I am becoming? I love that one because whether you realize it or not, every small choice you make is a vote for the leader that you're becoming. Love that analogy, hitting singles every single day eventually scores a lot of runs.

Speaker 2

You know, Mike, thoughts on that one. - Yeah, let's bring it back to atomic habits. That's exactly what this is, right? It's hitting singles every day. It's saying, here's the things I'm gonna go be, and here's the daily thing that I'm gonna do today to start down that path. It doesn't mean I'm solving it, I just am this person now, but here's what I'm gonna do to start down that path. I'm gonna do it every day, and I'm gonna stack it against something else to make sure I get it done, right? And then a week from now, I'm nailing that. Now I'm gonna add this, then I'm gonna add this, and I'm gonna add this. What's funny is we talked about leadership shadow in the last podcast. One of my team members, he's watching the podcast and doesn't say anything at the time 'cause generally I think I've lived that. And then over the weekend, he's in a group text chat with me and another leader, and I said something like, "I wasn't talking about that, you clowns." His response, he hadn't told me to watch this podcast at all was, Now Mike, what kind of leadership shadow are you casting with that comment? It was a joke, we're all laughing, 'cause it was funny where we're coming from to begin with, but that's it, right? Every single thing you do, every small choice, even that little text. We're all joking, but I probably shouldn't have said clowns. He is one of my direct reports, direct reports. So that's two layers down the CEO, getting a little too cute, you know? But that is, every single choice

Speaker 1

is a vote for the leader you're becoming. I totally agree. Shane, your thoughts on this? You know, it's back to what the theme of this entire podcast has been on. And even this series, finding that leadership within, to truly have that to be list and then truly be hungry enough to make that change. Have people ask me all the time, well, how'd you do this or that? Like, man, I still fail every day. I still do things the exact opposite of what I say I'm going to do. But the difference is when I get up the next morning, that's a new day to me. I say this because I truly live it. The past is gone, man. I can't change what happened yesterday. I'm in the moment now and I can't control what happens tomorrow. But to your point, it's what can I do today to reinforce the choices that I need to make to who I want to be? What daily choice can I make? Can I get up when I say I'm going to get up instead of hitting snooze? choice and that's also setting yourself up for that discipline. You know it starts very the very first thing in the morning is your first opportunity to do what? Make a choice to reinforce the new you. If the new you says I want to be in better shape, I want to make better choices in my life, I want to do these things, well guess what? Do not hit snooze on your phone. If you set it for 530 in the morning, at 530-03 your feet should be swinging around and hitting the floor. That is the first choice that you make and guess what? That will set the stage for the entire day. Because what happens if you hit snooze? The chances of you going back into a deep sleep pattern, a lot of things can disrupt or you're going to not get up and go to the gym or you're not going to do something. Now you've compacted the negative effects from one choice. So to me Mike, it's okay What little thing can I do in my daily choices to reinforce who I'm becoming? It doesn't have to be this grand doyce thing to where I'm, you know, standing on stages presenting to 10,000 people. It can be a single one-on-one conversation that I have with a coach that is providing meaningful lessons for them to be a better coach and a better person. It can be a one-on-one conversation I'm having with the client, so instead of being distracted, I'm actually listening to them, something that maybe they needed in that moment. So those little bitty choices that you make, you may not even recognize they're happening at the moment. You may not even recognize they've ever happened, but that's what starts to define who you become because that's just who you are now. You're the person that's the first on the ship. You're the person that's the first in the gym. You're the first person that's opening the door for a stranger, saying hello and being That's just so Mike all those little things we talked about atomic habits Traction they all accumulate to where you're starting to go down that path and you're starting to make those better daily choices But to your point and the one I brought up earlier It's still the same thing if you make a bad one, which we all do You you you recognize it and you move on from it and then you you start the progression again So that's kind of how my view that one

Speaker 2

Yeah, let me I just thought of one that's that's personal that no one would even know but me and it yeah If you don't lift weights, it's not gonna make a lot of sense to you But you know, I I love to push the weight up I love the compound lifts and I like to get stronger on each of them until I tear both my shoulders and I got a side pressure. That's that's a whole nother conversation, but But Shane I was squatting in the 400s and I loved it and I would go up every week five pounds But I knew I was not parallel I knew I was an inch or two high on all those heavy squats and I thought But if I can add five more pounds that I could have done the other way an inch or two lower No one knew but me But I knew and I knew it's not the kind of person I wanted to be so what did I do drop back down to 315 and I got deep and I Took me forever to move up from there and I just was so pissed off But at least I knew I was finally doing it, right And that's what we're talking about here is you you can drift you can drift and you can become whoever you want to be you Can you can have this persona, but if it's not real, what's the point? And so that was what it was for me and I wanted to fix it So I dropped it back down and I'm not I'm not even close to 400 right now, but I'm doing it, right

Speaker 1

I'm I'm progressing back up the weight which says a lot about you because most people would have just kept progressing in weight and went on about life, so It's it's exactly what you're saying. It's it's not just in what in your situation. It's to your point About being who you want to be and how your daily choices on who you become just that in itself because eventually my That that bleeds through to who you are because if you're not congruent to who you say you are I don't care what kind of smoke screen you can put out eventually. It's gonna catch you people are going to start figuring out who you really are. And it doesn't take long to figure out, is this person full of shit or are they for real? Right? So that to me, it's just a testament to who you are, man. And I appreciate that.

Speaker 2

Well, look, let's give our listeners some tools to try to work on this themselves. So my favorite tool, a tool we can all start today, is called the Aligned Action Map. It's really simple. You pick one or two habits, not 35, that anchor your to-be list, your identity, and help you push your mission forward.

Speaker 1

That's it. How does it work, Shane? So, Mike, before we start on how it works, why do people want when they do this self-assessment or a line action map, why do they just need to pick one or two things? Because you can't do it all at once. If you try

Speaker 2

to do three or five or ten things, you will not do any of those things. This has to be something you have to focus on and make it a consistent activity within your life. They all say 30 days to get things done. Some things are 45, some things are five or seven. But you've got to pick one or two things that you can really focus on and commit to. And when you accomplish that little joy of being able to do that, you're going to want to do it again. It will become this drug that's going to make you want to add one or two more things and one or two more things. And as you do that, you stack these little atomic habits over time to get to where you want to go.

Speaker 1

Absolutely, because you're exactly right. It's what we talked about earlier in the episode when you try to do too much too fast. You're setting yourself up for that failure. Pick one thing and get good at that one thing, then stack on the next. Let's talk a little bit about what we're talking about now, which is the Aligned Action Map. So here's a little bit about how it works for us. So one of the things that we recommend that you do is you write your identity statement. It can also be classified as your personal mission statement. It doesn't really matter what the heck it's called, but it is who you are. Here's mine for an example. This is a couple of things I do in the mornings before I get out of the bed. I start the day off and I say, "Dear Father, I want to say a prayer before I get out of the bed. I want to think about everybody in my life that I want to show gratitude for, and I want to pray over." That's how I start my day, and that is how I end the day. When I lay in bed at night, I say the same thing, "Dear Father," then I go into my prayer. When I get out of the bed and I'm in the kitchen and I'm making that water, you know, three words that I want to say to myself every morning. Protect, guide, and lead. It doesn't have to be complicated. It doesn't have to be something crazy. Those are the three things that, and this could change, it can change. It doesn't always have to be the same, but right now in my life those are the three words that sums up who I want to be. So basically, broken down into a full sentence. It's, "Today I show up fully, protector, guardian, and teacher, leading by example so those I love and lead can rise with me." Back to the three-word mantra, "Protect, guide, and lead." If I can do those things every single day of my life, then I know that I am who I said I wanted to be, Mike. I know that if we go back to the reflections, I'm clear and I'm consistent. I am acting out of courage because this is who I am, this is who I want to be. And lastly, these are the daily choices that I know that will enforce on who I want to become. I want to protect everyone in my flock, every client, every member of my family. I want to be the protector over them. I want to guide every human that's in my gym or even, you know, my family. You come in, my coaches, my team, I want to guide you. And then lastly, I want to be the leader that everyone knows they can come to for help, for direction. And if we can't figure it out or I don't have the answers, by God, we're going to figure it out together. So if I can nail those three things right now every day of my life, amongst other things, right? This is just my direct personal mission identity statement on my Aligned Action Map to make sure that the reflections I have, Mike, this keeps me from drifting. This keeps me on course and it is a reminder every day that I have an opportunity ahead of me to be just these things.

Speaker 2

Thoughts on any of that? Look, I think that that's, first of all, what a great statement. What a great personal mantra about who you want to be in a very simple way to explain that. And then so you've written that statement. You know that that's who you want to be. You know, how do you anchor that? You just said you do that through a number of things. So we want this to be super simple. So you're gonna pick that statement and you're gonna anchor it by doing one thing a day. And so what's one thing a day that you can do to anchor that statement?

Speaker 1

- One thing a day is, I kind of combine two, so maybe we can't use this, but I cheated a little bit, but they tie together. But one thing I wanna do if I say, okay, I wanna protect, guide, and lead. So I pick lead, okay? Lead is from proper fuel of my body and working out. So when I walk into the gym, They're going to see a person that cares and does exactly what he's asking you to do. I'm fueling my body with good nutrients, and then I'm exerting myself on that workout floor doing the same things you are at a high level. And that's the one thing that's going to anchor part of that statement. Now, I want to anchor personally, Mike, each three. That's just one example.

Speaker 2

Yeah, and again, maybe after you've I don't know how long this has been your statement. You can do that, right? You've got this one nailed down, so you add another one. Initially, we want folks to think about one component to take on and make it a priority. And you talked about as a gym owner, as a gym leader, this is obvious. You've got to do this. Some gym owners don't, but you understand that you've got to do this to demonstrate this for the people around you to lead them. But this is also a great one if you're just trying to lead your family, right? If your family isn't as healthy or isn't as structured as it could be, One thing you can do is just adopt it yourself, take it on. And if your family's not healthy, man, that's on you. And I don't care whether you're mom, dad, brother, sister, each one of us has the ability to influence those around us. And so this is a great one for that. So now, okay, that's your anchor. So then, you gotta think about at the end of the day, how did I do against that? So what are the habits that you follow

Speaker 1

to make sure that you achieve your daily anchor? - So one way to look at that, Mike, is how do I advance this forward, right? So we have the identity statement, we have habits that anchor that statement, and then how do I advance that forward to continue it on? So we ask ourselves, okay, where did I show up well today as a protector, guardian, or teacher? Where did I fall short or drift? And then what's one way I'll level up tomorrow? Like, those are the questions that I would want to answer given off each scenario. Like you talk about how you do yourself. You do an after action report. This is not much different. This is just an aligned action map to where when you want to advance it forward, it kind of slides into that after action report. How and where did I show up my best today? Did I make someone smile today? It can be that simple. Did I truly do the best job that I could do coaching on the microphone today? When I was on the floor as a floor coach, Did I get around and help my other teammate by keeping the room straight today? Or could I have done better? One of the ways we advance this forward as a team, Mike, when we talk about going back to the guiding and the leading, is after every single class, it is the rule that when the coaches come off the floor and they're standing face to face with each other, how could I have helped you better as a floor coach? Reciprocation, how could I have helped you better as the Mike coach? Because I tell them, if you don't ask yourself questions and truly be honest, how the hell you gonna get better as a team? Same thing goes with your personal mantra. Did I show up for myself? That's number one. Because if you ain't showing up for yourself, guess what? You cannot show up for anybody else. Number two, where did I fall short or did I drift today? And then lastly, what's one way I'll level up tomorrow? Mike, what I say to all the time is, comparison is the absolute thief of joy. However, there is one comparison you need to have and that Am I better today than I was yesterday? If I am, hallelujah, let's stack that win and keep advancing it forward. If I'm not, okay, where did I fall short? Where did I drift? What can I do to be better tomorrow than I was today because I fell a little short in understanding that comparison is simply needs to be a comparison of yourself. Mike thoughts on that.

Speaker 2

Shane, how many times in our, in our opportunities to, to interact with, with adults that are, you know, 30s, 40s, 50s, do they tell you? Maybe not in the exact words, and sometimes in the exact words, I just feel like I'm drifting. I just feel like I don't have a structure or a plan. And the truth is, when you get down deep inside of that conversation, they do. They know exactly what they want to achieve. They're just not doing it. And so that's what this is. This is what you just described is how do you build, you take this aligned action map, and you just every single day get 1% better. And comparisons of Thief of Joy, like you said, when you're comparing yourself with those around you. That's where you start to say, "Well, there's no way I can be like that person. "There's no way I can do what that person does." And that's dangerous and poisonous. But when you say, "I can be better than I am today, tomorrow, for sure." 1%, that's easy. We can all figure that out. And so when you start to do this, you stop drifting and you start stacking that momentum. And man, when you start stacking that momentum, it feels good. It is self-fulfilling. Momentum isn't magic. It's not even hard, but most of us find it difficult to do because it's difficult to want to commit to being that, to do the work to be better. It's easy to live in your comfort zone. So it's just these micro actions repeated to get your alignment.

Speaker 1

Couldn't agree more, Mike. And I've enjoyed doing this series, talking about the leadership from within, talking about the aligned action maps and even the after action reports. So much can come through clarity and understanding. And like we talked about in episode, the first episode we talked about during this series is the identity shift. We want to lead from the inside out. And we had such good conversations about how that looked and how that worked and ways to deploy that. To where we moved into episode two, we talked more again about emotional discipline. But basically how you regulate the room. Be in the thermostat of the room and be in the lighthouse and the things that you can do with that emotional discipline and then tying it all back together here with aligned action which you turn clarity into that momentum. It's like you just said, it's not that most difficult thing to do. It's the micro actions repeated in alignment. Be bored with your habits. Be bored with your consistency because I can promise you if you're bored, that means you're doing something right. It means you're winning. So always remember, if you get stuck on something, go back and listen to one of these episodes. And you know, Mike, we talk about this and how we want to promote leadership from the inside out and all these things. But this is just another small example of what we've been through, what we've been able to collectively understand and process, and just another little way of what we would be able to do for someone's team, leadership team, or just their workers in general to understand some of these practices and policies.

Speaker 2

- Yeah, man, give us a call. If you're thinking about how your team is not achieving these targets, it doesn't matter where your team is, whether that be a leadership team in a community setting or in a church setting or your family, you want us to come and talk with your family, we'd love to do it, it'd be our honor. And for this series, here's the big takeaway. First, identity is the root, Shane just said that. Emotions are the signals, here's what's going on. But action is the proof. When those three align, you don't just perform, you transform.

Speaker 1

Proof in action, baby. I love that. So here's the challenge. Build your aligned action map this week. Don't just say it. Don't just listen to this episode and say, "That was a good episode." Write down your mission statement if you don't have one. Ask yourself, "Do I have a personal mission statement?" I guarantee there's more people that don't than do. And then you ask yourself even further, "I'm going to push you a little further. What's my core values? What do I believe in?" Mike, you've got core values for your family. broke it down even into further pieces, what I think is fantastic. But it starts with you, right? You have to be willing to write down who you are and who you want to become. That is your true to be, right? Then you have to commit, okay? How am I going to anchor these habits? These are the habits that I want. How am I going to anchor them? And then how am I going to forward those? To continue this to where it's not a one-off. Well, I got up on Tuesday, but then I slept in the rest of you didn't accomplish much, did you? How do you beat that? Share it with someone that'll hold you accountable. That's how you beat it. Accountability partners are crucial to be successful. It's one thing to let yourself down. It's completely different to let someone else down that you care about. You don't want to do that as a human being. You want to be able to be the person that they know they can count on. So get that accountability partner. Mike's one of mine and sometimes he'll send me a message like, "Dude, what are you doing? You don't have time for that." I'm like, "Yeah, I know I did it anyway." But, you know, have that accountability partner to keep you locked in, Mike.